Lumpy Battles

You keep coming back
The first time i ever saw you
 I didn’t know who you were 
You came to see mother 
I wish you never came into our lives 
I wish i had never set eyes on you,
She let you dine with her 
And you put her to sleep

You keep coming back
Six times you visited Missy! 
And six times she has said no 
You’ve refused to give up

You keep coming back
What sort of man kills a woman
and courts her daughters 
When you first came to see me,
I thought I did enough to discourage you 
A second visit, and I was sure 
I would never see you again
But here you are

You keep coming back
What did we ever do to deserve you?
You’ve slept with mother already 
So, quit coming back!

An Encounter With A ‘Prophet'

I have the utmost respect for Pastors and spiritual leaders, although I am aware that several of them called themselves.

The bible says "...believe in the prophets, and you shall prosper.’ when Pastors and prophets make declarations and prophetic utterances over my life I believe it unreservedly. I have never believed in" "prophets" though (man or woman who looks into your past present or future and proffers a solution that will require some amount of money for people to go to the "mountain"' and pray for you.).

Up until recently I have had plenty to say about the practice though I had never had a personal experience. Well, that has changed, now it’s a case of "been there, done that".

After a lot of persuasion from a friend, I decided to go and see this "powerful Prophet"; I told myself, "it can’t be that terrible", I was wrong.

On that fateful day I decided to attend one of their deliverance night vigils’, we went remarkably early so I could see the Prophet before the Vigil started.

I entered his office and sat down; he sat opposite me, looked at me for a couple of minutes and asked me what my problem was. I responded that I did not have a problem except that my relationships do not last long. He asked if I knew what my problem was, I told him that was the precise reason I was there, with a sarcastic smile playing around the corners of my mouth.

‘As you are sitting there, what I see is a snake’. I literally sat forward, saying to myself that it had begun.

‘Well sir what can we do about it’? I responded.

‘Thank God you are here tonight, there will be deliverance ‘. He said.

He told me, I had a "spirit husband" the smile on my face broadened a bit, he asked me if I usually made love in the dream, I told him that I had never made love in my dream, then he told me, I had  "marine spirit".

‘You sleep a lot’ he declared, reason being that I subconsciously go for meetings. I responded that as a matter of fact, I have a problem sleeping; he simply shrugged and responded that I don’t sleep because they don’t want me to.

Ideally I should be confused at this double statement; I was rather tickled, with a huge grin on my face to show for it. He realised that he was not getting through to me and decided to throw in the real shocker.

‘Who did you have an abortion for? Because I see children standing behind you’ I could not help but laugh out loud [thinking of it now, I must have seemed quite possessed to him, with the way I conducted myself throughout the consultation].

In answer to that funny question I simply told him, I, had never had sex, so it was beyond me how I conceived and subsequently committed an abortion.

‘In that case you have spirit children’ he responded. He had obviously decided that whether I agreed or not there was something wrong with me, he went ahead to prophesy about the condition of my parents, I cut him off mid sentence with the information that my parents were dead. He would have held on to that if I gave an indication that I was in the least interested in what he was about to say but by that time the look on my face was that of bored tolerance.

Not willing to lose control of the situation, he prophesied that I was an unusually stubborn person, I heartily agreed with him while also noting to myself that, this was no prophecy but an observation. He asked me if I wanted to be delivered, I bobbed my head a couple of times in the affirmative, and then he gave me a sheet of paper which had prayer points and scriptures. I was to meditate on them, pray and also fast. He also told me if I wanted my deliverance to be complete, he had to ask some people who were dedicated to prayer alone, to go up to the mountain and pray for me, but I would have to give them money for transportation and feeding, and after they had finished, in appreciation I could give them any amount of money I wanted.

There was nothing left to be said. I had just been fed a pack of lies he knew it, I knew it. We also knew that no-one would be going to any mountain on my behalf.

I stayed for the vigil; the sermon was generally about "city pastors", their ‘Christianese’ and their iPads. But specifically it was about "marine spirits". The deliverance was also conducted, and like you have already guessed I did not fall or manifest, i must add that the prophet was not particularly happy with that because he kept insisting that some spirits were extremely stubborn. At one point, he actually pointed at me and said "young lady’" but he did not continue.

I know with every fiber of my being that there is nothing remotely wrong with me, so his assertions about me do not bother me in the least, what bothers me though is how and why we expose ourselves to fraudsters and swindlers.