Letter To The Grave

Dear Mom,
I wish I could forgive myself
for all the things I said and did
you didn't say it
but I know I let you down


I remember how you cried and begged me to stay
I remember how you longed
for us to be best of friends again
I remember the nights we sat quietly
And you tried to explain your decisions
and I also remember how fervent
I was in my sense of right
I remember saying, I had severed all emotional ties
I remember saying I didn't care if you stayed or left
I was hurt, I was truly foolish
how ignorant of your pain
and how selfish of me
to ask for something
that wasn't in your power to give


I remember how you waited for me
before you breath your last.
Do you know what I regret the most?
Not listening hard enough to hear you
moments before you were silent forever
the guilt has refused to go away
I wish I could have another chance
so, I'll spend each day
proving to you how much you meant to me.
You were right about everything you said
it's all true.
All is not lost completely
I have an opportunity
to try and right the wrong

she is exactly like you
she is become quite a beautiful woman
though not as beautiful as you
she's such a little 'Miss Perfect'
like someone we all know
I promise you
I have never loved anything or anyone more
I’ll give an arm and a leg
before I stand-by and
watch her put in harm's way
each time I look at her
I see you
and I love her all the more.

I know you forgave my stupidity
but still how will I ever
forgive myself
what will take this guilt away?

In loving memory